Sometimes, the best opportunity to be better at attracting men is
lying right under our noses. Everyday, life is full of little chances
that will help us become more of a “people person”, which of course
leads to GREATER irresistibility!
Even the most mundane of situations present a way for you to become
better at conversing with folks of all shapes and sizes (along with
quality men!). Starting today, all you need to do is keep an eye out
for chances to develop your conversational skills and self-confidence in
general.
Understandably, women who haven’t developed the habit of getting
there and mingling with other people won’t be used to kicking off a
great conversation. In other words, the thought of chatting with
strangers is unappealing to these girls … or even downright SCARY.
All it really takes are the right ideas which will help enforce the
habit of chatting up all sorts of folks. So for today, THIS is exactly
what we’re going discover.
Of course, if you would like the shortcut to your seduction success, you can check out Meet Your Sweet “Get A Guy Guide:”
Now, I’d like to familiarize you with the most basic aspects of being
a friendlier, more approachable version of yourself in order to make
men (and other folks in general) naturally responsive to you.
This is where the importance of FLIRTING comes in.
You might think that flirting is about making raunchy innuendo.
Perhaps your idea of being a good flirt has to do with lacing your
conversation with sexual implications and the like.
Well, this is actually just a misconception that’s given the fine art
of flirting a bad rap these days. The funny truth is that you can
flirt with just about any stranger out there, whether he’s a guy OR a
girl!
Before you get all confused with my last statement, let me clear up
what flirting is all about. It’s the ability to elicit GOOD FEELINGS
within a person, regardless of gender.
Basically, the point of flirting is a basic desire to spread
feel-good vibes among the people that you meet WITHOUT wanting anything
in return (like a date or romantic attention!).
Although your intentions for flirting are to simply have fun with
everyone, the ironic twist is that you’ll also happen to attract guys in
the process!
When you come across as a lady who has a natural tendency to make
EVERYONE around her FEEL GREAT, then that’s what good flirting is all
about!
If you’re able to associate your presence with positive emotions, it
would make sense for people to want to be around you. With that said,
how does a girl go about working on her flirtation skills?
#1: Pay them a compliment
Before you start handing out words of praise like they were going out
of style tomorrow, you need to have a CLEAR idea of what this is all
about.
Like what I said about sincerity earlier, you want to make people
feel good about themselves with no ulterior motive. Anyone would be
turned off by someone who was obviously just sucking up to him or her.
It’s easy to feel this way if the person got a whiff of phoniness
from a compliment. For instance, people can tell if you’re firing off a
flattering remark with NO THOUGHT at all… whereas EARNESTLY observing
something important to the person and praising it accordingly will
deeply resonate within him or her!
Although this seems like a doozy to pull off, it’s actually not as
hard as it sounds. A smart girl like you just needs to put her powers
of observation to good use!
As I mentioned at the start of this newsletter, all you have to do is
look out for things “hidden” in plain sight. Greater AWARENESS is
vital in situations like these, so keep your eyes peeled for things to
compliment people on!
The next time you run into someone with whom you can talk to for a
bit, try your hand at making him/her feel good with some well-placed
words of praise.
Don’t feel like they have to like you because of it, what’s important
is that you simply felt like saying something nice for the heck of it.
No more, no less!
For instance, if that new guy sitting next to your cubicle at work
has a cool screensaver from the movie “Avatar” on his monitor, make a
brief but meaningful comment if the situation allows it.
Saying something like “Hey, that’s a sweet screensaver… I guess you like the movie even more than I did!”
This is a great way to establish some RAPPORT and VALIDATE his personal interests.
Pretty soon, you might be adding more fuel to the fire by saying “I
love how the film gave the expression -walking in someone else’s shoes- a
new meaning!”
And who knows, it may serve as a starting point for a longer
conversation! In this example, all you wanted to do was to take notice
of something you HONESTLY liked and gave him props for it.
Sometimes, taking the initiative to pay a sincere compliment goes a long way!
#2: Keep it light, keep it fun!
Now that we’ve established that flirting is meant to make others feel
good, you also need to know about another important guideline. You
can’t generate those things within someone if you don’t feel good about
yourself to begin with!
Anyone with an infectiously pleasant personality knows that having
that a positive attitude begets the same vibe from the people around
them. That’s why you need to be “in the zone” when you’re mingling with
the folks you run into.
You have to remember that your level of energy must be just as high
(if not higher) than the person you’re talking to. Otherwise, your
flirting efforts will be a lost cause.
But that doesn’t mean you have to transform into a hyperactive
version of yourself… you just have to go by a few important pointers to
make sure that you’re always in top form!
For instance, thinking too much is one of the biggest positive
attitude-killers that will keep you from being at your most
flirtatious. Some women have a tendency to let the inner chatter in
their heads DISTRACT them.
I’m sure anyone at some point in their social lives has made the
mistake of trying TOO HARD to sound witty or clever. The end result of
this habit is that you end up thinking of what to say next without
bothering to LISTEN to the person in front of you.
Why pressure yourself and act like your life depended on it? It doesn’t work that way!
This line of thinking defeats the very purpose of flirting, which is
to establish rapport by being playful, relaxed and fun-loving. Driving
yourself mad with thoughts like “I hope this guy likes me” will only
keep you from giving him your full attention (which is a very ATTRACTIVE
thing to do!).
So do yourself a favor and just keep your ears peeled to the conversation. That’s the best way to keep the fun going!
Let me give you an example. Pretend that the guy you’re talking to
just told you about a great experience he had camping out with his
buddies by the lake over the weekend.
Maybe he mentioned that he got a kick out of momentarily leaving his
hectic city life behind and relaxing in the wilderness. Paying
ATTENTION to a key point such as this would then allow you to share some
of your own thoughts to complement his.
Then you can say something in a similar train of thought: “Wow, that
sounds like a lot of fun! You know, sometimes I need a little peace and
quiet myself when the week gets crazy… so every now and then I do my
own thing by chilling out at home, turn up my Zen music and curl up with
a good book!”
Bingo! Not only did you indirectly praise his interests, you’ve also created some excellent common ground between you two!
And you weren’t even trying to impress him by topping his story; all
you really did was to take something he finds important and give it
right back at him!
To recap: DON’T psych yourself out by thinking that a failed attempt at flirting is going to be the death of you!
Relax into the moment and keep a cool head about yourself. What should a sassy girl like you be afraid of anyway?
Flirting is a playful way of testing the waters with a guy. A
lighthearted verbal exchange is meant to let you know if your
personalities are going to mesh well.
If not, it’s certainly NOT any great loss on your part so there’s nothing to be freaked out about!
As far as the big picture is concerned, taking these little hiccups
in stride by staying POSITIVE is actually an attractive trait to have.
More importantly, the motivation for flirting is to simply share your
joy for living with others!
And that’s a lot easier to do than wanting people to like you. Go
for an impression that tells people, “I’m having FUN talking with you”
instead of something off-putting like “Won’t you please like me?”
If you want to keep the things fun, DON’T let your mind wander into thoughts about the OUTCOME of your conversation.
What happens AFTER the conversation is irrelevant. The important
thing is that you’re living IN THE MOMENT, totally focused on the person
you’re chatting with.
Did he laugh at your jokes? Great! Did he give you the cold shoulder? Great!
See, it doesn’t matter because this doesn’t have any bearing on who
you are as a woman. The great thing about these experiences is that you
LEARN from your accomplishments (or mistakes) every time!
So the next time you head out of the house, don’t forget to ditch the
negative self-talk and leave your unreasonably harsh inner critic at
the door!
The general idea is to open up to the rest of humanity out there and welcome the chances that come your way.
The broad spectrum of your cheerful personality is going affect
everyone around you: your family, friends, colleagues and of course,
the potential Mr. Right’s waiting to meet you!
—————————————————————————
This article comes to you courtesy of Meet Your Sweet
If you are serious about changing your love life success, the first
step on your journey of self discovery needs to be with Meet Your Sweet:
“Get A Guy Guide.”
If you want genuine men, and not just any man, let Mirabelle Summers
and the team challenge your beliefs about love and attraction, and show
you the way to become a seduction success story.
“Get A Guy Guide.”
No games. No scripted lines. Real life dating advice for real women!
